How can so much go so wrong so fast?

Let me begin by appologizing for the abrupt way that many of you found out about our sweet baby's passing. It hit us like a ton of bricks! Everything was fine when we left him on Sunday evening...as you can tell from reading our update that night. Around midnight, things began to go crazy...
We keep our phones by the bed and on the loudest possible ring so that we would hear that dreaded phone call if it ever came in from the hospital. I'd heard stories of parent's who'd received it and prayed that we would never be that unlucky...Oh...how wrong was I?!
Around midnight, Solomon's breathing unexpectedly took a turn for the worse. His doctors had no idea why and put the first call in to Sami and I. Unfortunately, too much pumping (for Solomon's food) and too much running ourselves ragged had caught up with us...Sami and I didn't hear the phone ring as we were both passed out asleep. We finally heard the phone the second time they called though, around 5:37 am, and I called right back. Doctor Green, yes the one who nicknamed him Scrappy, told us to come in right away, that Solomon had gotten very sick, and that he thought it might be a perforated bowel, but he really didn't know.
We were at the NICU by 5 till 6, and walked in to a horrifying sight. The doctor's eyes were already bloodshot as were many others. He had nurses, therapists and secretaries running around trying to save him. His belly was huge and blue. I looked at the doctor and he said it was very bad, but gave us 50 50 odds. I knew right away that Solomon had NEC, the silent killer, and that surgery was needed. The surgeon, the same one who did his PDA surgery, came back in and explained the exploratory surgery to us. He told us it would take an hour and that if there was any bowel left alive, he would be able to save our baby hopefully.
Alas, that was not to be. Solomon's bowels had quickly gone from perfect to liquid. There was nothing left...how could that be? He was perfect when we left him...It feels like a sick joke, but that's just the cards we are being delt lately. It feels as though someone has a huge hex on us... and dear Lord, I wish I knew how to make it go away. The sting of events we've been hit with lately is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, if I had one...How can everything be so perfect one minute and horrible the next?
Solomon and Rafe will be burried together on Friday, December 26th at 10:30 am in Frisco, TX at Ridgeview West Memorial Park off of the Tollway and Eldorado Parkway. The website is: http://www.turrentinejacksonmorrow.com/locations.php.
We will have a small viewing at 9:30 am at the funeral home itself on the corner of Main and Preston in Frisco - right across from the Frisco fire station.
In lieu of flowers, we ask that you please make a donation in our sons' memories to The March of Dimes, so that hopefully, one day, no parent will have to lose a son or daughter to NEC or any of the other horrible diseases of prematurity...

Heaven Has A New Angel!

This is Dana Southerland - Tracy's sister-in-law. She asked me to update everyone for her. Solomon went to be with Jesus today. Heaven has a wonderful new angel and he, with his brother, will be watching over Sami, Tracy, and everyone else. Please continue to pray for them and send your love! I am sure she will be in contact with everyone as she can - when she can. Thank you for your continued support and prayer. They need it now more than ever!

No more naked baby! :)

Yes, it's official, I got to wear clothes today, if only for a minute! And Mommy took advantage of the word clothes and decided a stocking would do. Aren't I adorable though? A definite chic magnet!
Solomon had another great day. He gained 50g today and is at 1160kg, or 2lbs, 8.9 oz. He did excellent while Missy and Mark put in a larger breathing tube for him. During the transition, he was on CPAP for a little bit and performed well. We spoke with his doctor, Dr Green this evening and he thinks that with adequate weight gain, Solomon can be on a CPAP around the beginning of the year. Around that time he should be able to maintain his body temp on his own which means we can play dress up more often. :)
I held my little darling again today. It's a wonderful feeling... especially when you get to look down and see him staring at you. Daddy promises that he'll be brave enough to hold him this week. I told him he'd better watch out because Solomon has a great grasp on him and Daddy's chest hair is fair game!
Keep us in your prayers please as we have an exciting couple of weeks ahead!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

I'm breathing more on my own today!

We spent several hours with the little guy today and noticed that he's doing better and better every day. Today he had his number of forced (vent fed) breaths cut down to 25 and he really stepped up his game and did a lot more breathing on his own. His doctor was so pleased that he finally mentioned the C word - CPAP. Graduation to a CPAP is a big thing for a NICU parent. :) And I can see it in the no too distant future. For now, he needs to keep up the breathing on his own and work on maintaining his oxygen saturation levels. He's very good and the de-sat, hi-sat game right now...
Solomon's little butt is getting better too now that mom's eating a more bland diet. He said thank you, trust me. :) He's up to 23ml per feed now and his fortifier has been added back in to bring the calories up to 22. The doctor mentioned tonight that they'll probably raise it to 24 soon. He's gotta keep gaining weight so we'll do whatever we have to in order to help.
I drove for the first time today in 6 weeks and lived to tell the story. I'll be going back to work on the 30th...it's coming fast too! I go to the doctor for my wound care on Monday and hope to get good news.
Thanks for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers!
Love,Sami, Tracy and Solomon

I'm a growing boy!

Solomon gained another 10 grams today to reach 1080 or 2 lbs, 6.1 oz. He's growing a tiny bit behind schedule since they've cut out the additional calories from his milk (because his little bottom is raw) so the docs have asked me to eat a blander diet and they'll try adding calories back to his milk. The goal is for him to gain 15-30g a day.
The place was a zoo today. One baby was going home so the parents were all loud and excited while another baby was being admitted which meant that people were running around everywhere. Solomon took it all in stride for the most part. His oxygen level got down to 30% but with all the addiitonal noise, he had to be bumped up to 35%... still not bad considering we were as high as 60% not long ago.
Our goals for now are to keep gaining weight, keep up our progess on weening off the vent and get to 1500g so mommy can dress the little guy. :)
Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

I saw Santa today!

The Plano Police Department was nice enough to schedule a visit with Santa for us today and Solomon received a teddy bear that is 5 times his size! It was a wonderful experience though. Check out the photo section for our picture.
Overall, Solomon had a great day. His sodium levels are normal, he got down to 31% oxygen (our air is 21%) and he graduated to a bar to hold his breathing tube in place instead of tape, so he's breathing more comfortably now. We did kangaroo care today and the alarms were silent yet again. Solomon was breathing well and I got to enjoy resting my cheek on his tiny head.
We hope you are all having a great day as well.
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

He gained 1.4 oz today!

Solomon is up to 2 lbs 5 oz now, and no end's in sight now that he's drinking 19ml 8 times a day. His lab results are actually showing that he's a little dry, so they increased his milk volume. His sodium was a little on the low side now that he's drinking milk only (no iv's) so they are adding sodium to his feeding tube to try to bring his labels up to normal levels. He's responding well to his chest physiotherapy and his lung x-rays keep getting better. We did 3 hours of kangaroo care today and both enjoyed it tremendously. His alarms barely went off, and when they did, it was because I mistakenly did something he didn't like such as taking his hat off to kiss him...oh well! I want my kisses!!!
Tomorrow he will be 4 weeks old and I'll be 30 years old. I've ordered 31 cupcakes to mark the occasion. Maybe I'll be nice enough to share. LOL
We thank you as always for your continued prayers.
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

We are back at 2lbs 2.6 oz... he's been a superman today!

I spent the day with my son today, and it was wonderful. He is very responsive to the voices of his parents as evidenced by his awesome breathing today when Mommy and Daddy were telling and reading him stories. His doctor even suggested that Sami and I record ourselves reading to him so that the nurses can play it for him when we are not around. Solomon has excelled in the GI arena as well - the boy can fill a diaper! And whoever said that breastmilk diapers don't stink lied! When they started adding calories to my milk this week to supplement his nutrition, he became an expert at stinking up the joint. We are no longer in doubt as to when he needs changing. :)
Solmon as I said is doing much better in the breathing department. The good doctors are tweaking his vent settings to ensure that he comes off the vent as smoothly as possible, but it still may take many weeks. I was told by his Grandma this evening that when his cousin Braydon saw his pics for the first time, he just wanted to know if Solomon was wearing a Superman mask on his face....from the mouths of babes! Now I smile when I see the vent tubes connected to his face instead of always thinking about how soon we can get rid of them!
Tuesday I turn 30 and Solomon hits the 4 week, 28 week CGA mark. It's a big week for us both, and I am definitely looking forward to spending it with him.
Thank you as always, for your messages, kindness and prayers!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

A double pounder with cheese!

Sami doesn't like it when I say that, but that's what he is. He is officially 2lbs 1.5oz now and is 33 cm long (12.8 inches). He tries to smile a little which is where I got the cheese from. :) Solomon's doing well. He let me hold him for 3 hours yesterday and is at 11 ml now on his feedings. He'll be at .5 oz before I know it! His little belly is not so little anymore and is growing every day. He's able to stay awake a little while longer now and tries to focus in on my face. His oxygen is a little higher now since he's breathing on his own and burning through more calories and energy. They are trying to bring it down, and hopefully he'll be successful with that today.
Thanks for your continued prayers!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

My boy knows what to do with a passy!

I got to hold Solomon again today, and he was very very happy with that. I hold him during his feeds now so that he will grow to associate me with eating. He is up to 8 ml now and will be at 15 ml Wednesday of next week. I said oz before, don't know what my tired brain was thinking! :)
Solomon rested his head against me so hard he actually got a bruise on his little cheek. Don't worry, Child Protective Services has not been called as the nurses could see how happy he was with me. LOL
Solomon got a dose of medicine today, surfactant, which is supposed to help his lungs continue to grow and develop. Our goal is to be off the vent by week 34, so he's got a little over 7 weeks to go. He has actually been breathing over the vent a few times today, but with all that he's been through, it's easier for him to let the vent do the work while he concentrates on growing, and I can't really fault him for that. They are decreasing his IV nutrition now that he is increasing his milk intake. So far, his little tummy is doing just fine digesting all of that milk. If only Mommy can keep up with his demands...
I got to the doc tomorrow morning and hope to get my wound vac removed. Then I'll have a lot of my mobility back and be able to do more with my little man. Hopefully we'll both have a good week!
Thanks again for your kindness!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

Our baby boy keeps growing!

He's at 2 lbs 2.6 oz as of yesterday! He may be a little less today when we go in because they've been giving him a diuretic to help him prepare for the blood transfusion he received last night due to slightly lower hematacrit levels. This is pretty normal though given all the blood tests the little guy has to put up with on any given day. We had a nice visit yesterday that was cut short (I only held him for 2 hours instead of the 3 we both wanted) because my stupid wound vac machine decided to act up. I will be soooooo glad when I get to remove that thing. Please pray that I get the go ahead on Monday to just use dressings on my wound until it heals. You have no idea what a hassle the wound vac is. It's also a blessing though because it has helped me to heal much faster than I would have otherwise.
Solomon is doing pretty well overall. His sodium levels are approaching normal and his blood gasses are pretty good. He's breathing a little on his own still, but is a little lazy in that department which, I quite frankly, think he's a little entitled to be after all that he's been through. We've got a few weeks to work on that though, and hopefully early next year he'll be off the vent.
We can start dressing him when he reaches 1500 kgs, and he's at 980 now, so I am getting his wardrobe ready. :) I've been told I can bring in his personal blankets and socks now, so the hunt is on for premie socks. Mama got his blankets washed up for me last night so he'll have his own blankets to lay on going forward. Every little bit of personalization helps to make the experience a little less surreal. Not sure if I mentioned it already or not, but his grandparents also bought him his first Christmas tree and nativity. And, Daddy had to be sure that his favorite jeweled out camel is there to watch over Solomon when his Mommy and Daddy can't be there.
Please continue to pray for all of us. We ask particularly that the Lord continue to give Solomon the energy to fight and to make the brain connections that breathing on his OWN is a good thing. :)
Love always,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

We are an ounce shy of 2 lbs!

Solomon's eating 6 oz of milk every 3 hours now... poor Mommy is beginning to feel like a cow! :) He got his PAL line out today which is a tremendous relief to us all. It was a little late in coming out which means Kangaroo Care had to be put on hold. But we are back on track now. Yesterday, everyone was worried that our little man might have an infection, but so far, he's proven them wrong. He's still leaning on the vent quite a bit for breathing support, but this could be because the tube they have down his throat is no longer the right size given his fast growth. They will be fitting him for another tube in the coming week to see if that helps with his breathing. Solomon was wide awake for Mommy and Daddy today during touch time. He opens his eyes for us quite a bit now. I actually got a couple of pictures today of him with is eyes open, and hopefully they will come out well. As Solomon continues in the convalescent phase, please pray for him to show the strength to breath without the vent. It will be a long process, but he can do it.
Thanks for everything!
Love,Sami, Tracy and Solomon

What can grandparents/family/friends do to help?

The birth of a premature baby is an emotional time for everyone. As a grandparent you probably joyfully anticipated the birth of a healthy baby. It is natural to want to take your child’s fears, pain and anxiety away, but that is sometimes not what he/she needs right now. The parent(s) of the new baby need to be supported. They are going through a life crisis. The first thing to realize is that this is a very difficult and confusing time for the new parents. Our society has not worked out how to deal with the preemie phenomena yet. The advice below may seem contradictory – that means you have to be careful to tune into how things are going for the new parents before you follow any of it. Different people react in different ways, and every parent and every baby is different.
Suggestions on how you can help include:
• Offer a hug, a tear, or other signs of love and concern. Try to be strong for the parent(s) who are on such a roller-coaster ride of emotions.
• Offer to be the family communicator. Find out exactly whom to notify and what the baby’s parent(s) want others to know. Communicate that information – no more. Group emails are a great way to get the word out, and you can always print and save them for a later date to give to the parents. They will appreciate your efforts.
• Try to alleviate guilt. It is natural for a mother of a preemie to feel guilty for not carrying the baby to term and to feel responsible for the condition and problems of the baby. With rare exceptions, there was nothing the mother did to cause the baby to be premature or have problems. She needs to hear this over and over again. Sometimes having her talk to her obstetrician is reassuring.
• If there are other children and they know you well, offer to care for them; spend extra time interacting with them, help them to feel as important as the baby.
• Help with household chores: going on errands, getting groceries, cooking picking up the house, yard work, caring for pets, providing transportation for their other children or for the parents. Often the mother cannot drive for up to 6 weeks after delivery. She may need rides to the hospital until she is released from her doctor.
• Acknowledge the baby’s birth like you would if the baby had been born on time, such as sending flowers to the mother, buy something for the baby, take pictures. Gift suggestions include: disposable cameras or film, baby book, diary or calendar to record important events, snacks for the hospital or coins for the vending machines, pre-paid gas gift cards or pre-paid long distance calling cards, etc.
• Become involved with the new baby only to the extent that the parent(s) desire. Let the parent(s) have time alone with the baby. If they don’t invite you to become involved, accept their need for privacy.
• Be empathetic regarding their concerns for their child. Let them know how worried you were when your children became sick.
• Help parents keep their focus in the right place, on the baby! Decrease additional stresses in their lives. This means putting aside any personal problems, such as disagreements, conflicts with other grandparents or children, or feelings of being “left out.” Be sensitive to the emotional strain that the premature birth is placing on the preemie parents. Try not to do anything to make things harder for them. This may mean excusing them from family duties such as reunions, birthday parties or other gatherings.
• Find something about the baby to compliment at each visit, be it hair color, eyes, willingness to fight, cute feet, long fingers, a loving staff of nurses, etc.
• Praise your son/daughter/friend for his/her strength through this stress; it provides encouragement.
• Help the parent(s) keep up with his/her health. They tend to focus only on the baby, excluding and sometimes risking their own health and well being.
• Suggest talking to a professional or seeking out medical help if the pressures grow too great.
• When setbacks occur, go back over all the successes the baby has had to date; help them acknowledge the battles the baby has already won. Even when setbacks seem minor, do not minimize how difficult they are for the parents.
• Offer to stay with them during NICU visits. Often a parent is alone. It can be a lonely time and just being there may help. If this is refused though, don’t see it as a sign of exclusion; respect the space your child or friend needs.
• Be there for them when they need you. This might be during surgery or a sad moment, when dinners are needed, when they need a hand with the camera or merely a funny card. It may seem like your son/daughter/friend calls only in times of dire need, but that is when they need your help the most.
• Keep in touch often, even when it’s only leaving a message on an answering machine telling them you care. Often, evenings are a good time to see how the baby’s day went. Keep the conversation going only as long as your son/daughter/friend wishes. Remember they are physically and emotionally exhausted and may just need to know that you are thinking of them and their baby. Keep questions general, such as “how was the baby’s day today?”. Try not to ask if everything is “all right”; there is always something that is not right - often it’s just the mere fact that the baby is still hospitalized. They will provide information when they are ready to share it. Often, parents will only tell you that it’s been a bad day. Respect the fact that they do not wish to rehash the painful event again.
• If the nursery allows grandparents to visit, the person should ask permission from the baby’s parent(s) before doing so. This empowers the parents and gives them the message that the grandparent or visitor wants to respect the wishes of the parent(s) and that they understand the seriousness of the baby’s condition. Grandparents can also help others understand the importance of having the parents be the decision makers for their baby. Mothers of preemies are usually extremely protective of their baby during and after the NICU stay. They will typically make the baby’s health a priority over everything else in their life. Be understanding of this.
• Educate yourself. Whether it is through the Internet or books, you will find it easier to understand the factors involved with a premature infant and this will enable you to understand what the parent(s) are going through even more.
• Clean, clean, clean! Remember to always wash your hands before visiting the baby. This should apply to when the baby goes home also. This will help to prevent the spreading of germs that could possibly put the child at risk. Preemies are generally at higher risk for infection and diseases. Please avoid all contact if you think you may be sick or not feeling well. Respect additional instructions that may exist from the parent(s) as there may be special circumstances for further safeguards. When the child comes home, they are still not like a full-term baby. Even if it seems the parent(s) are overreacting, they are just trying to protect the health of the baby.
Having a child admitted into the NICU is usually a new experience for all families. Their lives will be forever changed by the new bundle of joy. The suggestions in this list may not apply to your family but is intended to be a helpful tool that hopefully can make your road a little smoother. Parents of preemies may go through a range of emotions such as fear, anger, sadness, guilt, depression, anxiety, frustration, helplessness and many others. Be patient as they are not themselves at this time. Eventually, things do settle down and the healing can begin (for everyone).Taken from University of Wisconsin Department of Pediatrics: UW Pediatrics: Parents of Preemies

Solmon gained and ounce and lost a line! GREAT DAY!

Yep, our little guy gained a whole ounce overnight now that he's back on feedings, and has had 2 extra feedings a day added! His lung x-rays looked better today, and Doctor Perez approved the removal of his PICC line. It seems like just yesterday that we struggled so hard to get that line in place! His PAL line (arterial) is next to go and should be removed this evening. I know Solomon will be thrilled as the line and all the wrappings to keep it in place make is left arm look like a club. Don't let him fool you either, he will bat it around in a heart beat and work himself into a fit. His nurse today has the arm restrained in his bed and the little guy is finally calm without sedatives being used. I was shocked. He's not alarming as much, and just looks more at peace. I bet he'll be even better after they take the line out this evening. I know I'll be thrilled because if that line comes out, he gets more Kangaroo Care tomorrow!!!!
KANGAROO FRIDAY, HERE WE COME!
The docs are pleased with his progress and are slowly starting to ween him off the vent. He's tolerating it well so far.
I went for my two week follow up with my OB today which was tough, but we survived. I have a really good OB who goes out of his way to check on me and Solomon. I told him I don't know when he sleeps and he replied that if I want Solomon to be a doctor, push him towards dermatology so that he can get some shut eye. :)
We read the babies' lab reports and confirmed that both had been exposed to the infection that I have, but that we were able to get Solomon out before the infection could pass to him. We'd been told that before, but seeing it in writing is a different story. Especially seeing that they found evidence of infection in his umbilical cord too. I didn't know that until today.
Keep those prayers coming, and we'll keep the ounces comning, how about that? :)
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

We have progressed to the next phase!

Today Dr. Perez, the doc who actually took care of Solomon after delivery, stopped by to give us the gloom and doom speech. We get this every day from one of the doctors, so we are used to it. It's their job to prepare us for the worst so that we are happy when that doesn't come to pass. Today, Dr. Perez said that Solomon has moved past the "Acute Care" phase and is actually moving into the "Convalescent Care" phase in which we will begin to focus on feedings, weight gain, and weening off the vent. He then proceeded to tell us, like the good docs before him, that Solomon's major obstacles at this point will be avoiding BPD, accute lung disease, which affects many preemies born at his size. So, we read up on that disease and discovered that it sounds horrible, but most who get it grow out of it with time as their lungs continue to develop. Actually, it sounds a lot like a description of my own lungs due to asthma's harsh effects on them. I proceeded to read a description of the disease to Sami, who gets terrified everytime I mention a disease or issue we should look out for with Solomon. I thought he was aware of the docs' "gloom and doom" strategies after all we'd been through in the past month, but apparently not. Luckily, he had a nice chat with Solomon's nurse while I was pumping and now fully understands that Solmon stands a good chance of pulling through just fine w/o BPD, or blindness, or any of the other scary things they throw at us.
Solomon's still tolerating his feedings well, and we hope to start increasing them slowly tomorrow. He's grown a bit in the past two weeks and now weighs 1lb 11.9 oz and is 12 1/2 inches long. The next 6 weeks are his convalescent period and will hopefully show lots of weight and height gain. He was a fast grower in the womb, and I fully expect him to continue. :)
Every day I learn of a new prayer list to which our little Solomon has been added. We are so fortunate to have so many loving friends and family supporting us during this time. I miss speaking and visiting with you all as well, and look forward to the day when we go home with our "Scrappy" and get to introduce him slowly to all of those who have helped him make it this far!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

Kangaroo Care Rocks!

Sooo... Solomon's doc said this morning he was doing good, but not excellent. Well, we weren't having any of that! He gave me permission to do Kangaroo Care today, which is skin to skin contact between parent and child. Solomon still has several IV's, so I was surprised that he gave permission, particularly given that he has a major line going into his left arm which is very sensitive. However, once they put my son in my arms, he began to perform like a champion! His heart rate soared, his oxygen sat got better, and he began to breath double and tripple over the vent. He did so well, they let me hold him for 2 hours and joked that I should just move in to the NICU and hold him all the time. I already am looking forward to our Kangaroo time tomorrow! And yes, before you ask, they took pics of me holding him which I hope to get developed this weekend and will post online.
As always, thank you tremendously for your love, prayers and support!
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon

We had another good day!

Solomon had another good report card today. He's off his bp meds completely, and is doing well in that department. His blood gasses are better so they are starting to ween his settings on the vent, and he's been responding well to that. Solomon's big goals for now are:1. Start feeding tomorrow2. Ween off the vent, and3. Decrease the inflamation that's showing on his lungs after the surgery (nothing unexpected, but a must fight nontheless).
He's officially nicknamed Scrappy now. His doctor called him that the other day, and I kind of like it. It describes him very well. Solomon's still on a little bit of sedative, but that's mostly because he's ready to wiggle around too much while he still needs to heal. They have cut the dose in half, and hope to continue to do so until he's off completely.
I changed his diaper again today, and he's doing well in that department. He is still getting rid of the merconium which helps with his billirubin numbers. They are low enough now to come off of the light, but the docs want to give him another day.
I swear the boy is growing! He looks much longer than when he was born. I hope to get pics up this week...I promise. They will measure him again tomorrow night. The doc says he still has some fluid in him and that I should expect him to lose weight for a few more days before beginning to gain towards the end of the week. He's officially 780 grams right now (1 lb, 11.5 oz) but the docs are using 700 grams as his true weight (minus fluid) which means he's gained 20 grams in 2 weeks. Now that he's past the PDA surgery and starting to see the benefits, he should begin to gain faster as he goes back on breast milk and continues his IV nutrition.
I am doing better too. My hospice nurses came for the first time today...what a riot they are. My "torture" was better today (changing the vac on my wound) thanks to good drugs which I had to promise my doc to only use when the nurses were treating me. I got a hair cut and feel like a new woman.
As always, thanks for your love, care, prayers and support. We don't know how we'd make it without your encouragement.
Love,
Sami, Tracy and Solomon